What do Meredith Grey, Olivia Pope and Annalise Keating have in common?
If you watch even a shred of television you know these are characters created by Shonda Rhimes, and each stars in her own dramatic TV series. If you watch Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal and How to Get Away with Murder, you are bound to have become fascinated by one of them.
They are people who confront life in different worlds but with the same magnetic quality. As millions tune into the TGIT season beginning January 24th, I ask: Why are we so attracted to these women? What makes them like friends or mentors, people we want to have in our lives?
Says one student of law professor Annalise Keating: “I want to BE her.”
In a recent interview with ABC’s Robin Roberts, Shonda Rhimes and the actors who play these roles talked about the new season. Roberts asked about the writing and how it would play in these juicy roles.
Scandal star Kerry Washington (Olivia Pope) made a point that’s stuck in my head for days now. She said, Shonda doesn’t write our characters from the outside in, how they look to others. Instead, she writes from the inside -- the essence, the guts. She writes from knowing their soul.
That nailed it.
You see their confusion and pain, their vulnerability and strength, yes, the strength of these women. They’ve become real people to us with real lives filled with uncommon courage. They live close to the bone; they go after what they want; they make mistakes, own and fix them, then pursue the next thing. We connect with that realness and want it for ourselves.
As a coach and a psychotherapist, I find that to be inspiring – for my clients and myself.
Can we be compelling characters in our own lives? Can we embrace the truest sense of ourselves, the raw essence of who we are? Can we use that as the main vehicle to create the stories that comprise our lives? Can we be our own heroes – on the good days and bad? We must!
The Raw Truth
A couple years ago I was at home sick with the flu and my husband brought me the ultimate consolation – DVDs with a few seasons Grey’s Anatomy. Dopey on the couch, I watched them for days. Episode after episode, seeing some more than once, I studied Meredith Grey’s communications. One thing stuck out to someone as polite as I: She told off her snappy friend, Dr. Cristina Yang, on a regular basis. She did it with a kind little smile but with the bluntest messages possible: “You’re acting like a bitch, Cristina.” The rawest truths made it all the richer.
Can we create that richness and honesty for ourselves and each other? Can we lead lives that are direct, skillful and from the soul?
The New Year is about you!
Some people don’t trust or like New Year’s resolutions or goals. They think they are hokey. I agree that making the same resolutions over and over makes no sense. Who hasn’t failed at the I want to exercise more and lose five pounds game?
The concept of new beginnings and having a calendar marker can be beneficial though. What are we doing otherwise? Just running in circles?
That’s why every year in my counseling practice I try to offer people the opportunity to reflect on their lives and move forward.
This year’s theme is Move on, move up.
I take people out of their lives for a day, cocoon them together in a comfy place and ask questions about where they are, where they want to be and how they will get there.
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| Moving On, Moving Up |
Many of the clients, former clients, friends and colleagues who do it, love it by the end of the day. They leave with a one-page summary to guide their upcoming year.
We offer this program in mid-January since that’s when the traditional resolutions have faded and people finally have the head space to reflect.
Many come back the next year and share their results. We have lots of testimonials. A benefit for me is that I have to go through the exercises myself before facilitating the group.
Moving On Moving Up
Our Best Year Yet program is Saturday, January 17th. – Moving On, Moving Up in honor of this lovely, little fish. We still have room and would love to have you join us.
With new beginnings in mind, one of mine is to speak with you on this blog.
I’m dipping my toes into the blogging world where I’ll share stories, insights and new ways of looking at life. I may ask questions, cause you to reflect or challenge you to think about your life – much as I do my own. And, of course, I’ll welcome your feedback.
I’ll close with one of my favorite topics, peak performance.
The Other Meredith
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| Meredith Dincolo Photo: Jason Birnholz |
Peak Performance: What is it and how is it achieved and sustained?
That will be a recurring topic here as it’s a passion for me. I’ll soon tell you about another Meredith, Meredith Dincolo who danced at the elite level for 14 years with Chicago’s renowned Hubbard Street Dance Company.
It’s a fascinating story… stay tuned.
